Good evening and happy Friday night! I pray that each of you is safe and happy! GO NECKS!!! have to give a shout out as my high school alma mater is in the play- offs in football! It has been an emotional day for me, I miss my daughter so very much and from time to time it seems all I do is ache to hold her in my arms and hug her...living 17 hours away is really sucky! I know that many only wish they were 17 hours away and many cannot hug their children now nor will be able to until they make their journey Home to paradise, I have so much respect and admiration for those who get up each day with this knowledge...it is very difficult for me sometimes and then I feel ashamed for being such an emotional boob when my baby is alive and well, just in another state! God bless each of you missing your child tonight, may He comfort you with his loving arms and allow you peace that only he can give.
In prayer tonight I prayed my normal evening prayers asking God for mercy, grace and blessings for all of our troubles and trials. I prayed for the sick, the ones just recovering from surgery, those going through rehabilitation that he might lay his healing hand upon them and wax them strong and healthy, I asked him to shield those suffering addiction, depression and other problems that many do not understand and tend to turn a deaf ear to, that He might give them peace in their minds and hearts this night and a loving nudge that He does understand and that they can talk to him with promise that he will help them. I asked him to be with all of those on the highways tonight that they be returned home with no incident. I thanked him for all of the wonderful blessings in my life and for unanswered prayers for he knows way better what is best for me than I do. As I was closing my prayer, I had a great heaviness in my heart, I recognized the heaviness being mostly the loneliness for my child, but also the feeling of being not wanted by my family. I realize that being so far away has bridged a gap between us and that they have their lives there and I here, it does not excuse the fact that I still love them and have need to be a part of their lives, the phone calls are very few and most always instigated by myself. As of late I have been really evaluating the pain and sadness I feel from this. I have to think about why I am letting it hurt me as it is! Does there come a time when you feel unwanted that you adjust and move forward, letting the throb become a dull ache and the bright hope become just a dim lit bulb? I cannot continue to beat myself up over the "why" and I must concentrate on what is real. I admit I have not been the best daughter or sister in my lifetime and I take responsibility for that but the hurt of non communication and only half interest when there is communication has really made me suffer in my heart. I ask that you pray for my peace in heart and my calm in spirit this evening, I am asking God to strengthen my heart and allow me to concentrate only on what is most important, that being my child and my unborn grandbaby! I am so thankful for her and for my friends that I have here in Utah. I love my friends and I so appreciate the love that you all give me. Sorry to dump on you this evening with my personal issues I just felt that I needed a little extra prayer:)
No More Tears To Cry!!!
by Kumar
Every second somewhere in this world,a heart is broken,
somewhere a soul departs,with words of wisdom unspoken,
Somewhere the thunders are silenced,with sounds of tears,
somewhere every second is lived,with a feeling of years.
Every minute somewhere in this world,a new love is born,
somewhere a happiness is just dying waiting to be reborn,
somewhere a heart is imprisoned in someone else soul,
somewhere a life is heading towards an end without control.
Every hour somewhere in this world,a journey is stranded,
somewhere the roses are taken away and thorns are handed,
somewhere a dream is broken to be carried away by the waves,
somewhere a mercy is seeken,yet no one comes up and saves.
Every day somewhere in this world,some face fakes a smile,
somewhere the sleep is lost,with every night turning hostile,
somewhere questions are unanswered and doubts are uncleared,
somewhere the clock has frozen and darkness is always feared.
Every night somewhere in this world,prayers are being made,
somewhere the pain is released with a cut from the blade,
somewhere holding a pillow,someone is missing their love,
somewhere the gates of heaven are being knocked,to travel above.
Every year somewhere in this world,someone loses the race,
somewhere someone fades away even without leaving a trace,
somewhere a new star proudly holds up its place in the sky,
finally someone is happy,as there are,"No More Tears To Cry".
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