I am what I am...I am who I am...and I am happy being me!!!!

Who I am

I would like to take a moment and allow you all a little insight about me, no I do not walk around with the bible in my hands shaking it at people, I do not go around throwing holy water on people as they pass by, I do not shove religion down any throats and I do not walk around shouting praises to God, well I do praise him a lot but I don't shout!!! 

I am a 50 almost 51 year old woman who has been to and through the pits of hell in my life, I have been married more times than I am proud of and have crumbled each time it fell apart, I have lost weight, gained weight, lost it and found it again. I smoke cigarettes...(ugh) and occasionally drink a beer, yes beer not wine or hard liquor simply because I do not like the taste. I have been known to and will most probably continue to laugh at a good joke as long as it does not take the Lord's name in vain. I like movies yes I watch rated R but will turn them off if they take the Lord's name in vane, the same goes with reading books. I am not a prude, I tend to lose it at times and will even catch myself saying words that are really not desirable. I get angry, I get depressed, I get frustrated....I am a human being and I live in this very difficult place we call earth. 

For any of you who call me names, I accept that you do not understand me. I love...that is what I do...I love everyone and when people try and make me not love them I love them that much more. I pray for them, I ask God to bless them with whatever it is they are lacking in their lives that keeps them from happiness and joy. I forgive... when I allow myself to be hurt by the actions of others I quickly forgive, I forgive myself for allowing the hurt and then I pray, I ask God to bless them with whatever it is that they need to have joy in their lives. I trust... even when there is reason for doubt I give the benefit, and when I am proven wrong and my trust is broken...I pray, I ask God to bless them with knowledge that they are only hurting themselves with lies and deceit and I ask God to bless them with truth. I believe...that we all are from the spirit world and what we choose to do with our lives are our own choice, when I see that a person is really making poor choices I pray, I ask God to shine his love light upon their hearts and to fill them with knowledge that they are better than what they are choosing, that through him they can get on the right path and walk in the footsteps of the one who will lead them to paradise. I have faith...that God would not have brought us to this place in our life to have us fail, he would not have given his son for us and then allow us to be left alone to try and make it on our own, he is with us at all times, he is our biggest cheer leader and he wills for us to overcome hardship so that we can know happiness. 

I am a mother, I love my daughter with all of my being, she has been the light of my life and continues to bless me with her sweet spirit each and every day. I cannot express to you what she has done for me and my faith in this life. My only fault at being a mom is that I try to hard to protect her from hurt and sometimes make promises that cannot be kept. I am like a fierce lioness when anyone tires to harm her and would give my very life to keep her safe. 

I am a grandmother, I feel the same way about my grandson Chalmers, I would lay my life at God's feet to protect him, I have 6 children who have been my G~babes for near as long as they have been alive, I love them with all of my heart and would die to protect them as well.

I am a wife...I love my husband so very much, I thank God each day for his spirit, his goodness, his kindness and his love and I strive to make his life as easy as it can be. 

I am a friend whether you want it or not, I love each of you and will always be here to lift you and your situation in prayer. I never break a trust that is given to me and I never would intentionally hurt another human being.

I am a Christian...by choice, I love God heart and soul, I love Jesus Christ and all that he gave for me, I love the Holy Spirit and his guidance when I am straying off the path. I pray many times during the day, have seen miracles produced because of prayer and stand amazed at what a difference prayer makes in my life. I read the scriptures and am always astonished at how so much applies to my very life. I know that there will be a time when I am called home to heaven where there will be no more pain, anguish, worry, stress, drama and woe, there will be only beauty and love! I look forward to the day that I do go home, I look forward to the reunion with those who have already made it and I look forward to one day soaring with each of you. I know the difference between right and wrong and I wake up each day thanking God for another chance at getting it right. 

To sum it up in a nutshell....I am me, you can take me or leave me but I will never leave you. I love each of you and am always here!